My Mom stopped by to visit me at work today. Just for a minute. Just to give me a hug. I appreciated it, but was a little baffled as to why I needed a hug on a random Thursday afternoon. Don't get me wrong, I love hugs any day of the week, but bear in mind my Mom lives 30 minutes away. So she hugged me and then she said, it was 26 years yesterday...... how soon we forget.
So yes, maybe I didn't realize that yesterday was the 26th anniversary of the day my Dad passed away. I never called to check in with my Mom. Never lit a candle. Nobody mentioned the day to me. I did text with my brother, but we were watching Survivor and discussing what a horrible game move Ozzy was making and wondering why Coach was such a tool.
I'm not one to get hung up on "the day". The years click over, but it doesn't really matter. Yesterday was the same as today and it will be the same as tomorrow. He's not here. When my kids want to call Papa, they'll talk to Mike's Dad. When the pipes are leaking under the house, we'll call Mike's Dad. My Dad won't be here for birthdays or Christmas or babysitting or to brag on his grandbabies.
It's not how soon we forget. How can you ever forget? Every day I look at my girls and a part of me is crushed that he's missing this. Every day.
2 comments:
:( Big hugs for you. A friend of mine just lost her dad yesterday. I guess that feeling never really goes away, the loss is still fresh. Another big hug, just because.
Oh Shannon. I read this and wept. I remember when your dad died.. and I'm so astonished it was 26 years ago. when did I get so old? I'm truly heartbroken for you. When I was 13 I didn't really understand, but now that I have kids, I read this and it messes me up.. I just wish he could have seen the light and understood what he could have shared with you and his future grandkids.. and with Dave etc. It's tragic in my heart and I wanted to let you know how truly deeply sorry I am.. I wish your children got to meet him.... a kind, wonderfully funny man.
Jenny Beer Cartwright
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