the things we do for love

Well the big birthday bash is being planned for this weekend. After much discussion and weighing of options Mike and I have decided on the following. Abby is having 5 of her little friends over for lunch and then we'll have the traditional family extravaganza for dinner. Yes, I realize that this is two birthday parties in one day. And no, after planning out Project Simplify Christmas, the irony of it is not lost on me.

Here's the thing though, special events like birthdays, Christmas and various other holidays can be difficult when you're dealing with a fractured family. Please note, I use the term fractured in the nicest possible way. Now, compounding the problem this year is Abby has built a little bit of a life on her own. She knows her birthday is coming and she wants to be with her friends. Which is a list that changes daily, save for a few. Now we could have just invited her friends and had family as well, but a good friend of mine (thanks Lynn) pointed out that the invited kids might be a little overwhelmed by that. Another solution, since she wants to be with her friends is just to have a party with her friends. Good idea, except she wants to be with her grandparents too. All of them. Oh and believe I know I'm not going to make everyone happy, but I always feel like I gotta try. So for this year we'll try it this way, but it could very well be back to the drawing board for next year.

This past week Abby and I wrote out the invitations to the 5 kids that we're inviting (3 boys, 2 girls). Four of the kids live on our street and we are friends with the parents of three of them. I exchange hello's with the Mom of the fourth kid on our street, but the fifth kid I haven't laid eyes on before in my life. I know, so why invite him, right? Well only because Abby talks of nothing else but this boy. He is her "bestest friend ever and no they aren't going to get married because she's going to be a supply teacher and teachers don't get married". For those of you who correctly guessed that her teacher is single, give yourself two points and a pat on the back. So here I was trying to write a note to convey to this kid's Mom that I wasn't a crackhead, but if she had any concerns about the possibility of me being a crackhead she was more than welcome to stay with her son for the party. Oh and then I just went and invited her to give us a call and chat if she had any questions or concerns. Then before I changed my mind I sealed up the envelope and dropped it in Abby's backpack and immediately started to hyperventilate.

It may have come up before that I'm painfully shy. Oh and awkward. Have I mentioned awkward before? I hate being in party situations with people I do know, let alone people I've never met before. I don't do the mingling/small talk thing well at all. In a flash of genius I had added my email address to the invitation and prayed really hard that she'd choose that as her preferred method of communication. She did not. Thankfully, she called when I was in the bathroom indisposed and Mike got the call. Mike had a nice chat with her, but that wasn't surprising since Mike can make friends standing in line at the grocery store. He's very personable even though he'll swear up and down he's not. Oh and they both will be attending the party. ACK!

You must know I will be spending the remainder of the week worrying about this party. I am well aware that a shy person can very easily come across as cold and/or bitchy. I really wish I could be the easy going person extroverted personality type that both Michael and Abby are. There's just something missing in my wiring. Case in point, at Christmas I wrote Abby's teacher a nice note saying how much we appreciate her hard work and how impressed we were with how much Abby had learned in a short period of time. I had a chance to see Miss Abby'sTeacher at school that same day and she approached me to tell me that note was the best gift she had received and it was something she was going to hold onto. Know what I did? I just stared at her, like a deer caught in the headlights and said nothing. Nothing! See, I told you it's a chronic case. Now what I am great at is pig backing. What I need is a more socially adept sidekick, or I guess I'd be the sidekick. Yes, I need a stronger personality type I can be wingman for. They can be Maverick, I'll be Goose. Now, obviously that's the reason I married Mike, but I think we'll be separated more than we'll be together. No, I need a lady Maverick and bonus, she can help me with the food. Anybody willing to apply for that position? Okay so now you know I'm a socially awkward freak, will you think any less of me if I tell you that I *am* really looking forward to using my cupcake tree for the first time?